My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?
Erma Bombeck
For those of you who don't know, I love Erma Bombeck. This woman, may she rest in peace, had a great sense of humor about life. I love that she had something funny to say about almost every topic you might think of. One of my favorite books that she wrote is A Marriage Made In Heaven, Or Too Tired For An Affair. If you want to laugh until your sides hurt, this is one that will make any woman laugh!
So today's events were pretty lame. I got up at 5:45am to get my sweet little Bella in the house for the day and went promptly back to bed. I woke up a few hours later, had my shower and sat quietly till the kids started to wake. As I sat around looking at the state of my house I wanted to drag all the kids out of their beds and put them to work. Peace and Quiet or whining kids? Which do you think I choose? One by one they start creeping down the steps, first Sarah, followed by Olivia, then Abigail and always last Emma. We had breakfast and meandered around for a bit.
Finally I realized that nothing was getting done and I obviously needed my Smoothie Brews fix for the day or nothing would be accomplished. I hopped in my car and headed for my cup of joe. I decided today was going to require a large coffee. Upon arriving at home half of my coffee was gone all ready and I was ready to get to work. I started barking out who would be doing what and what we absolutely had to get done. Everyone went to work. There were some drifters at times but I quickly got them back on task. There is no way my house will ever be spotless and quite honestly, I don't care if it is. We live here after all, it's not a museum.
Now there is another matter I would like to discuss, 5 year olds. Five year olds are their own breed of human beings and that might even be a stretch. I am not sure what happened to my sweet little Olivia. It's like an alien has invaded her body. Here is an example of conversation I had with her today.
Olivia can you please stop jumping on the couch?
NO! I don't want to!
Excuse me? What did you say? (Parents, we are so dumb...I know darn well what she said)
I am not going to stop jumping on the couch! You can't make me!!!!
Excuse me? (Obviously I am going deaf because I am not hearing her correctly)
I like jumping on the couch it's fun and you can't make me stop!
Game over young lady - Time Out!
She begrudgingly goes to time out, all the while telling anyone who will listen that I am not the boss of her. In time out she decides that she is going to play with whatever is in her reach - whatever, at least she went right? Next thing you know Sarah is pleading her case with me, "Just let Livie Lu out of time out Mommy! I want to play with her." Abigail is telling me that I am too soft on the little ones and I should be tougher. WOW! I am so glad I have them to tell me how to parent them because I would be so clueless without their guidance! Geesh, I am not even the boss of Olivia..what ever was I thinking? Yup five is grand!
Scott gets home from work and asks if I am going to dinner with him, his Mom, and their friends. I declined but told him he could drop the kids at my Mom's house for V.B.S. and I would gladly stay home ALONE! At 5 o'clock they all left - blissful silence. Ahhhhhhhhhh I sent a text to my friend Jennifer to celebrate the fact I was all alone. She in turn asked how in the hello kitty that happened and did I want to hang around an adult for awhile. Did she seriously ask me that? Of course I don't want to hang around adult! Am I crazy? Hello Kitty YEAH!!!!! Let me get cleaned up and I am on my way. It probably would have been nice to be here all alone for a time but the truth is I would have gotten bored and done something crazy like clean.
When I got to Jennifer's we decided we were going to get something to eat. Jennifer's Mom had just been over before I arrived and told her that she had some various restaurant gift cards she could have so we went over to see what she had. Outback it was....we had both had a yummy sirloin steak! It should be mentioned that we had to be starving because neither of us left one bit of our meals on the plate. It was so really nice to hang out with a friend and have an uninterrupted conversation. Although, there was a family sitting across from us who decided to bring their tired cranky crying baby out to dinner - Thanks we greatly appreciated that :o) Thanks for dinner Janice!
After dinner I began to head home. I decided to call my Mom to ask where she was with the girls and see if she wanted to meet me somewhere for me to get them. She was very happy about my offer and agreed to meet me. As she pulls up you can just tell she is frazzled. The kids all jump out of the car and go running all over the place. Olivia starts running through the little park in front of us and refuses to come back (5 is greeeeeaaaat!). Emma and Abigail start chasing her which only excited Oliva more in her apparent escape. Sarah was in the car touching every button there is in the dashboard area. My Mom said, "Man am I glad to have them out of my car!" REALLY? Because I am so excited to have them in MY car. WOW!
And that is a day in the life.
Sincerely,
The Queen of Insanity
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