The Bitch Of Living

Yes, the bitch of living - Life!  My title is a song from what turns out to be a very depressing musical.  I have loved the music since the moment my sister introduced it to me.  However, I had never seen the actual production. This was until my God Daughter, sent me a YouTube link to a boot leg video.  WOW!  I never realized how intense and sad it all was.  The song title seems appropriate for how things have been going lately but the song is actually about teenage angst.

Once upon a Friday night, when I would have preferred to be out, my personal boojay (pronounced: "boo"-"jaa") advisor came over to put her excel spreadshit sheet formula on my computer.  She got it up and running and then I had to face reality.  One by one we went through the debt that floods my "To Pay" folder. *Not to be confused with a man's fake hair piece.* What I learned, there is no money in my "boojay" for anything.  In fact, there isn't even enough money to pay my bills. My advisor said, "How are you doing this every month?".    Truth? I have no fricken' clue! I can tell you this, I was keeping the boat afloat until the ole handy dandy renters decided to run us into an iceberg.  Now we can barely make it paycheck to paycheck.  Shortly after this counseling session was over, my financial advisor turned back into my dear friend and we promptly went to have a drink - which I might add, was not in the boojay!  However, I felt it important to calm my nerves down with the help of my other good friend, Captain Morgan.

The next evening, I invited another friend over.  She declined due to lack of funding or what my posse and I refer to as an  "Economic Crisis".  These times are simply depressing.  Now I was stuck at home; lonely, depressed and broke! *sigh*

Fast forward to last Thursday, I got up and decided I needed to make a list of bills that HAD to be paid on Friday.  I made the list and realized that there was no way that Scott's paycheck would cover all of them. This list stressed me out and I needed to escape this reality.  I didn't think it would be appropriate for me to have a meeting with my good buddy "Morgan" so instead I insisted that Scott take me out to dinner.  In the boojay??  Not only hell no but hell to the no!  However, in the interest of sanity, he took me out.  On the way home from dinner I got a text from Tammy telling me she would come visit me the next day due to my depressed state.  My reply, "I was thinking of escaping to you!" And so I did. 

I arrived at The Smith Inn a couple hours later.  It was a good escape from reality.  Tammy and I stayed up till four in the morning, listening to music (our favorite past time), talking about our woes and enjoying one another's company.  The next morning I took a long hot bath in her claw foot tub, she made me eggs, bacon and toast.  I give The Smith Inn a five star rating! Problem is, I had to go home at some point.

When I finally arrived back home, I had to face reality.  Reality bites people! I don't even remember what that movie was about but it should have been about my crappy financial state.  Blockbuster!  Turns out, there was about $1000 worth of bills that I couldn't pay.  (Did I mention that I love my x-renters?) There was a solution but Scott wouldn't hear of it.  His remarkable and earth-shattering advice, pay the essentials...house, car & insurance and utilities and then whatever else you can.  Really?  I never thought of that!  Love you honey....thanks so much for that helpful tip.  I was thinking of paying to have an addition built on the house!  EEERRRRR

After all the bills I could pay were paid, I had a little nervous breakdown in my car - good for the spirit I think. I spent the next couple days depressed on the couch.  Confession, I really didn't spend all my time on the couch. I spent some time driving the kids to different destinations and when I was home and able, I was on the couch. 

Sunday, I was down to only Sarah. Olivia was with my parents and Emma and Abigail had gone with Scott's Mom for the night and next day.  It was sorta peaceful around here with only one kid to manage.  Finally Monday rolled around and I was forced to hang wallpaper at our rental. 

A word of advice, if you buy wallpaper (which turns out to be next to impossible in 2011) make sure it is pre-pasted.  I had to order wallpaper thru Lowes because every wallpaper establishment this side of the Mississippi has gone out of business.  I could have sworn that the back of the swatch said pre-pasted.  I was wrong! I opened the wallpaper and was ready to get started when I looked down and thought to myself, "Hmmm, the back of this looks odd" then the directions fell out of the packaging.  Oh it was odd all right!

"Prepare wall by first applying sizing to the area you plan to wallpaper" (uh huh, uh huh) "Then using a paint brush or roller coat the back of wallpaper with a quality paste before hanging" (What? Paint or roll back of wallpaper with paste? Why would I do that?) 

Off I went to Lowes to buy wallpaper paste.  I do not recommend using wallpaper that requires you to paste the back.  In fact, I don't really recommend wallpapering at all.  It is truly a nightmare.  If you think that was bad, you'll love this!  I got three full strips up and realized the double roll would not be enough.  Back to Lowes to order more wallpaper.....Seriously bitter at ex-renters! None of this is my boooojay!

Sincerely,
The Queen of Insanity